From Your Minister – December, 2011
Sunday, 27 November 2011

So here’s what happened.

I got invited by a friend to be a part of a project helping some people. It was something I had committed to do, and like to do, but for various reasons this particular invitation was a bit last-minute and well, things sort of fell apart.

At least for me.

It was a complex job in its own way, so I had to pull together a bunch of tools that I didn’t have organized as well as I would like, and then one of the tools needed some work, and then I wasn’t really dressed for the job…and well, you get the idea. The whole morning ended up being pretty chaotic. Also, when I got to the worksite, it was also a bit of a mess. It was somewhat hectic with a number of people, many of them youth, all looking for something to do RIGHT NOW. To top it all off, I had my son that day, so he was dancing around, making noise, and dearly looking for the attention I wasn’t really able to give.

In the end, the work got done. People were helped. We did what we needed to do. So that’s good.

I also managed to break an expensive tool, to lose my Leatherman multi-tool which I’ve had faithfully through all manner of conditions for more than fifteen years, to spill hydraulic fluid all over the place, and worst of all, to snap at my friend a couple of times for getting me into the whole mess.

Over the next week I fixed the tool, got a new Leatherman (it’s nice, but not the same…), and apologized to my friend. I couldn’t do much about the hydraulic fluid, but I tried. All in all, no major harm done. But my pulse still races when I think of that day, and how I wish it had been otherwise.

And it could have been. All I needed to do, I believe, was to sit and think for a minute, to focus my mind, to get my soul and mind and hands on the same wavelength. I know how to do the work. I know how to use the tools. I know how to take my time and do a good job. I just didn’t.

I let myself be driven by the arbitrary pressure of the schedule and other peoples’ pictures of what I needed to do.

What I really needed to do was to take the time that I needed to take, regardless of whether that fit other peoples’ pictures. I needed to be ok with being just a little bit late, and as a result appropriately prepared. I needed to remember to be me.

It’s the holiday season and people everywhere (including me, I’m afraid) will be exhorting you to do more and more. To come to this or that event, to join in this or that activity.

It’s the holiday season and other people everywhere (including me again, I’m afraid), will be telling you to slow down, to listen to the music, to feel joy, to take your time. You may need to slow down, you may need to speed up. You may need to feel joy, you may need to feel sad. Only you know what you need. Only you know how to listen to your heart, and to get your soul and mind and hands on the same wavelength.

What I wish for you this holiday season is that whatever is going on in your life, you will be able to remember to be you—that you will hold on to who you are in all your wondrous glory and in the face of whatever crazy convoluted expectations people throw at your days.

With Love and Faith,
Paul
Merry Christmas!
Happy Hanukkah!
Blessed Yule!
Blessed Be!